The evolution of procrastination

If multi-tasking is considered to be the modern-day specialism of the female of the species, then I guess that spatial orientation – the ability to see and manipulate things in 3 dimensions – is typically the preserve of the male.

Received wisdom suggests that this trait came about because men were the hunter-gatherers back in Stone Age times. If starvation was the price paid for being a lousy shot with a sling or spear, say, or for setting up your trap the wrong way round, then it would make sense. And so it follows from that particular line of enquiry that men ran about all day waving sticks and clubs, hiding from each other and making a lot of noise whilst women stayed behind back at the cave ranch, looking after the children, boiling up bones and assembling attractive throws made of woolly mammoth hides. Thus one also sees the evolutionary importance of soft furnishings.

But there must, even then, have been men and women who defied their pre-ordained gender roles. Men who were, for instance, much better with children, mushroom collecting and stew-making than they were with sabre-toothed tiger hunting and trap setting. I’d bet, too, that some girls and women went out on the hunt and flung their spears with as much accuracy and beat their bosoms with as much glee as their men folk.

I think that because I’ve come to the conclusion that my distant female Stone Age relations were spear slingers and not stew stirrers. (This is not to say that I’m any good whatsoever at throwing things because I’m not; just ask the dog where his ball or stick lands up when I chuck it for him. I am quite a good shot with a rifle though, come to think of it; if we’re at a fairground, I’m the one to ask to win you that giant green plush stuffed dolphin with luminous pink eyes). My (some might say flimsy) evidence for this?

a) I’m dust, grime and other domestic chores blind
b) I’m good at seeing stuff in 3-D

The ability to see things as they could be and not as they actually were was certainly an asset when it came to converting the pile of rotten tumble-down old sticks that the barn was when we first bought it. I had no problem at all in visualising room divisions, stair cases, kitchens, bathrooms, plumbing, drains and all the rest when there was nothing more to it than a few mouldy old rafters and a hundred heaps of rats’ nests. It was also an asset when we were trying to solve ways of tackling some of the construction work without the whole lot crashing down on our heads.

But there is a downside I have found to this spatial awareness lark; because I can visualise something as it could be, my brain leaps to the conclusion that that is how it is already. And thus my garden (ok, yard – it’s tiny) in my mind’s eye is a blossoming, blooming, buzzing, chirping place full of flowers, fruits, shrubs, miniature trees, tasteful shaded seating arrangements and colourful pots of good things. When in actual fact it looks more like a piece of derelict waste ground that just happens to be outside my back door and surrounded by a dog-proof fence.

I know in reality that just thinking about how it could be is useful; but it’s not really quite as useful as actually picking up a spade and rake and getting on with it, is it? One can only assume that the trait of procrastination must come as a buy-one-get-one-free side order to the whole 3-D seeing spear slinging gene. So can I say, just for the record, that on Friday – yes, this Friday – I am going to devote the whole day to digging in and getting started with the renovation of the back garden.

You have my permission to fling a spear at me if I don’t, ok?


Talking of procrastination...

My sister sent me this photo of Roo (on the right) and I from her mobile phone to put on my blog page. It was taken at my sister's house just before Roo went back to university in January this year.